Have you ever wanted a celebrity home video?
That’s the idea behind Cameo, the online service where people can hire celebrities to create a short video message. This means you can hire David Hasselhoff to wish your wife a happy birthday, Ice T to wish a happy birthday to a family member who is a rap and/or Law & Order fan, or have Dolph Lundgren threaten to break you, if that’s what you want.
If you’re a die-hard Canucks fan, though, you might not want a video of The Hoff, or Wayne Knight, Melissa Joan Hart, or Fran Drescher. You might want a video of your favorite Canuck instead.
You might get lucky. Maybe.
I’ve rounded up all the current Canucks, former Canucks, and personalities loosely related to the Canucks who are on Cameo so you can get the personalized video message from a Canuck or Canucks-adjacent person you’ve always wanted.
Current Canucks on Cameo
There are only two current members of the Vancouver Canucks on Cameo, but they are two of the team’s biggest stars: Thatcher Demko and JT Miller.
Unfortunately, both are currently listed as “unavailable” on the site, so neither is taking Cameo requests at this time. It’s a shame, because they both have a 5.0 star rating, so fans have been fully satisfied with their videos in the past. Additionally, Miller has a note on her page that all proceeds from her Cameo go to the Save Your Skin Foundation, which raises money for skin cancer awareness and research, a very worthy cause.
You might not be able to get a cameo from a current Canucks player, but you can get one from his head coach.
That’s right, Bruce Boudreau is on Cameo and is obviously willing to fulfill even the weirdest requests, if his video for “Pettersson’s Church” is any proof.
Boudreau’s Cameo videos start at $85, and you can even request a 10-minute live video call for $254.
Former Canucks on Cameo
There are nearly two dozen former Canucks on Cameo, including active and retired players.
That includes an all-time Canucks great to Kirk McLean, who has the “greatsave” URL for his Cameo page, which is very fitting. You can reserve the last of the great standing goaltenders for $65.
There are a few other former Canucks goaltenders on Cameo: Eddie Lack, Andrew Raycroft, Louis Domingue and Kevin Weekes, although Weekes is best known for his work as an analyst and hockey insider these days.
You can also get some more recent former Canucks, such as Justin Bailey. If you’re from Richmond, Troy Stecher might be the best possible person to book on Cameo. The ever cheerful Nate Schmidt is available. If you want to imagine what could have been, you can book Tyler Toffoli to tell you about the alternate reality where he re-signed with the Canucks.
Zack Kassian and Sam Gagner are available for the weirdos who are Canucks and Oilers fans. If you prefer unsuccessful prospects, Frank Corrado and Jordan Subban can help.
One of the greatest former Canucks on Cameo is Todd Bertuzzi, the big and talented power forward who was a key part of the West Coast Express. You can really catch someone off guard and knock them down with a personalized message from Bertuzzi.
There are other former Canucks on Cameo for old school fans, like Bret Hedican, Russ Courtnall – not as well known as his big brother, Geoff, as a Canuck but still – Mike Weaver, Shane O’Brien and Brad May.
You can also get Rick Vaive, who is certainly best known for his eight seasons with the Toronto Maple Leafs, scoring over 50 goals on three occasions, but he was a Canucks draft pick, fifth overall in 1979 and played a season in Vancouver before he was traded to the Leafs along with Bill Derlago for Jerry Butler and Tiger Williams.
Yes, the Canucks traded a fifth overall pick who went on to set a franchise record for Leafs goals and a total of 441 goals in 876 career games. Derlago was also excellent in Toronto. Seems like it’s a trade that doesn’t come up often enough as one of the worst trades in Canucks history, perhaps because Tiger Williams was so beloved in Vancouver.
Speaking of Tiger, he’s not on Cameo, but he’s on a very similar site: Memmo.
On Memmo you can also find Dave Babych, Greg Adams, Geoff Courtnall – hey, there he is – Corey Hirsch, and the professor himself, Igor Larionov.
You can also get a Cameo from Mark Messier. I’m not sure what Canucks fan would want a personalized video message from Messier, which is probably why Messier doesn’t even show up on the site if you search for “Canucks” on Cameo.
But if you really want to say something directly to Messier’s face — or at least his face on a screen — you can book a live video call with Messier for the low price of $2,500.
Am I telling you to spend $2,500 to say something untoward to Messier? No. I have no say in what you do with your money.
Assortment of other Canucks-related people on Cameo
Maybe you don’t want a current or former Canucks player or coach. Maybe you want someone who is related to the Canucks but has never taken the ice with them. You’re lucky!
Al Murdoch, the Canucks’ PA announcer, is on Cameo and there’s something to be said for having someone with his golden pipes talking for a living delivering personalized video.
Jeff Paterson also talks about the Canucks for a living and if you’re a fan of the journalist/podcaster, you can book him on Cameo.
You can also book the Green Men – the super fans who have tormented opposing players in the penalty area for several seasons. If you’ve ever wanted to know what Force and Sully look like, you can get a personalized video message from them and they’re honestly pretty funny.
If you prefer your Canucks fans to have faces, Canucks YouTuber and parody songwriter Canuck Clay is also on Cameo.
As for Memmo, you can ask former Canucks general manager Brian Burke to record a video message, although he’s unfortunately listed as unavailable at this time. Shame. I was hoping to hire him to record a message challenging Harrison Mooney to a barn fight.
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